About Me

I have done a lot of things in my life and have also worked in many different jobs to make a living and to experience life. This blog is just some of my musings, sometimes funny, sometimes inspirational, sometimes sad, sometimes angry, sometimes simple but all the time, it's just me.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Irony Man

I'm broke but I'm happy
I'm poor but I'm kind
I'm short but I'm healthy, yeah
I'm high but I'm grounded
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed
I'm lost but I'm hopeful baby
I feel drunk but I'm sober
I'm young and I'm underpaid
I'm tired but I'm working, yeah
I care but I'm restless
I'm here but I'm really gone
I'm wrong and I'm sorry baby
I'm free but I'm focused
I'm green but I'm wise
I'm hard but I'm friendly baby
I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chickenshit
I'm sick but I'm pretty baby
What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving a high five

Life is mostly like the song lyrics above. Happiness or unhappiness comes from a choice within hat you make. But can one truly be struggling and still be happy.

Struggles are what we are for. Buddha's 1st Noble Truth is that life is suffering. That may seen very negative and very discouraging considering that Buddha is the one who showed people a way to lead a balanced lifestyle and still achieve Nirvana.

But to truly understand the noble truths, you must always go beyond the 1st one and read the other 3 noble truths. Buddha talks about acceptance, accepting that in this life, you are born, it is bound that you will face some level of suffering. Dwelling into the suffering or denying the suffering or being angry about it will not end the suffering. The only best thing then to do is accept it and once you have accepted that you cannot do much about it, you will find a ways to move on and end end that suffering as well.

This is not difference than the grief cycle known as DABDA. Sometimes, we as humans when in grief or stress or loss will go through DABDA. The Five Stages of Grief, was first introduced by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in 1969, the year I was born.
  1. Denial — "I feel fine."; "This can't be happening, not to me."
    Denial is usually only a temporary defense for the individual. This feeling is generally replaced with heightened awareness of possessions and individuals that will be left behind after death.
  2. Anger — "Why me? It's not fair!"; "How can this happen to me?"; '"Who is to blame?"
    Once in the second stage, the individual recognizes that denial cannot continue. Because of anger, the person is very difficult to care for due to misplaced feelings of rage and envy.
  3. Bargaining — "I'll do anything for a few more years."; "I will give my life savings if..."
    The third stage involves the hope that the individual can somehow postpone or delay death. Usually, the negotiation for an extended life is made with a higher power in exchange for a reformed lifestyle. Psychologically, the individual is saying, "I understand I will die, but if I could just do something to buy more time..."
  4. Depression — "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?"; "I'm going to die... What's the point?"; "I miss my loved one, why go on?"
    During the fourth stage, the dying person begins to understand the certainty of death. Because of this, the individual may become silent, refuse visitors and spend much of the time crying and grieving. This process allows the dying person to disconnect from things of love and affection. It is not recommended to attempt to cheer up an individual who is in this stage. It is an important time for grieving that must be processed.
  5. Acceptance — "It's going to be okay."; "I can't fight it, I may as well prepare for it."
    In this last stage, the individual begins to come to terms with her/his mortality or that of a loved one.
Sometimes, it can go back and is cyclical. For example, I personally was in a stage of acceptance for a certain situation and some incidents happened that took me right back up to anger and depression.

Yes, it sometimes seems like an irony or like a joke God is playing on us. So what to do? Deny it, be angry, be depressed, try to bargain or just accept it?

Sometimes, it is okay to be ironic, I am Irony Man. The only powers I have is same as yours, I have feelings, I feel all of the above. I am sometimes angry, I am sometimes in denial, I am sometimes depressed, I am sometimes bargaining but I know moving on can only be when I am in acceptance.

Over the past year, I have accepted quite a number of things but I am a human, I am Irony Man, so I am not perfect. There are things that I am still in denial about and there are still things I am angry about. Sometimes, I do feel depressed. And just like the rest of us, when things are down, we always go to God to bargain, to show us the light, to lead us to the right path.

I am Irony Man but I am hoping that I will be Acceptance Man, soon, I hope.

Take care and be well.

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