About Me

I have done a lot of things in my life and have also worked in many different jobs to make a living and to experience life. This blog is just some of my musings, sometimes funny, sometimes inspirational, sometimes sad, sometimes angry, sometimes simple but all the time, it's just me.

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Expired

What if we all came with expiry dates on us?

We all know when we are born, sometimes even to the minute of when we are born.

But what if we also knew exactly when we would die?

How much different would you lead your life?

What would you do differently?

Problem is we humans know we are mortal but many a times we live an immortal life.

We may want to do something, but we procrastinate or we put it off till tomorrow, or till next time.

Many of us do not even have proper plans – whether it is life plans, vacation plans or any plans.

But what if today, God or someone close to God came to you and said, you will die (or as an Indian would say, you will expire) on 21 December 2012.

Okay, so you now got slightly more than 2 years to live.

I am sure you will do something you have always wanted to do.

What if it was 20 Feb 2020?

You have got about 10 years to live.

I am sure you would still plan it well and do things you want to do.

But now, we do not have an expiry date and we live our lives like there will be no end and we can just postpone things until tomorrow or later.

Why don’t we live like there is no tomorrow? Or as American Idol winner Kris Allen says, “Live like we are dying.”

Why don’t we put any urgency to important things in our lives?

Why do we keep complaining and venting about work, or parents, or siblings, or this friend or that person?

I am no different.

I want to be different.

But actions speak louder than words. And many obligations, trials and turbulences always block us from moving forward.

We keep trying but never doing.

That is the most difficult. To live like you are dying … We all are.

"After all is said and done, more is said than done," Aesop.

Take care and be well.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Passageways

There is this place, deep deep inside somewhere.

There are many rooms and many passageways leading to the different rooms.

Some rooms have a consistent flow of activity, in through one passage and door and out through another.

Some rooms remain empty.

Some passages rarely used.

But they exist.

And in their inactivity, they become dilapidated.

Bad things grow, they rot, fungus and moss on the walls, the floor of the passage cracks, weird animals start living there.

Some passages are imaginary, or an illusion. They exist, but sometimes you do not see it.

Some rooms are bright and shiny but no passages lead to it.

Or no passages that you can see.

There are passages where you use your other senses or you use your feeling to get to the room.

Some pathways stink like rotten flesh, or like the worst shit. Some rooms too. But this too have their purpose.

Finding the right path, one sometimes has to look within.

There will be people who help us every now and then and there will be people who hurt us or trick us to using the the wrong passageways.

But at the end of the day, you have to use your instincts. If you do end up on a wrong passageway or room, do not beat yourself up on it. There are reasons for everything. Lessons to be learned everywhere, in good and in bad.

Sometimes, in the stillness of mind, you get the answers you seek.

A friend forwarded me this quote taken from an excerpt from a book.

"The Voice of Silence is Supreme. It is Beyond All Levels of Consciousness and All Methods of Communication. Silence Will Give You What the World Cannot Give You."

Silence will give you a connection to God and silence will give you the answers you seek. The answers will just come as you sit silently in meditation and silence will set you free.

Take care and be well.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

A good head and a good heart

Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela (Madiba) once said that a good head and a good heart are a formidable combination. But when you add to that a literate tongue or pen, then you have something very special.

Many a times and many a people have mentioned to me that I have the knack for writing and many a times I also have a knack for talking, speaking sometimes even "twisting".

I have always had this desire to write a book, I still need to be inspired to do so.

If you ask me what the book will be about, I will say, "I have no idea yet. It could be about nothing and it could be about everything. It could be about food and it could be about love. It could be fiction or non-fiction. It could be about travels or it could be about sitting at home and writing blogs."

Or it could be about all of the above. It could be about everything.

But one thing is for sure, it will not be epic 1000 plus pages of nonsense.

It will not be nonsense because everything I have done before has been mostly with a good head and a good heart.

But that is still not good enough. Not good enough because it is mostly.

I will do everything with a good head and a good heart. Everything that I say, I write, I do will be done with a good head and a good heart and without any malicious intent.

It will be truthful and I know people say the truth hurts ... honestly, it should not hurt because the truth will set you free.

I will not be malicious in my intents and I will not be hurtful in my intents.

However, if one is hurt in the process, remember that it was done with a good head and a good heart and find it sometime in your life to forgive.

Trust, Accept, Believe and Forgive. Love.

I will trust. I will accept. I will believe. And I will forgive.

And most of all, I will Love.

Madiba also said that no one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate. If they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.

It is easy to hate, despise but that is cowardly. To love always, you need to be brave.

I am in this world for a purpose, not a selfish purpose, not a prophetic purpose, but a good purpose.

I want to appeal to the hearts not the mind nor the intellect of people.

"If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart."

To appeal to the heart, I will speak the universal language, Love.

My head and my heart will be filled with love.

Take care and be well.

Monday, June 21, 2010

Friday Nights

Friday nights are usually nights when a lot of people go partying.

Basically, people hang out with friends in pubs or clubs until wee hours of the morning.

Have "late night" suppers which are more like breakfasts at 4am or even later.

I was not much different, going out with one friend or another, spending and wasting money.

(Even if there is an abundance of wealth in the world, one should never abuse or waste it.)

The last time I went out on a Friday night was on 4 June.

I ended up paying for drinks (basically I am stupidly generous).

A bunch of us went to Cavells. It is a nice place and I do like listening to the bands there.

Problem is, we always drink too much, which means we spend to much.

About RM500 was spent the last time - and maybe RM130 collected. Now I know I drank quite a bit but for sure not RM370 worth.

Recently I had to go for some so called birthday party - supposedly drinks only. I was hungry so I ordered a pizza and when I was going to pay for my bill, I saw a bottle of wine was also put there with my pizza. I had 1 glass ... although others had it too ... plus I assumed drinks were paid for.

And I am one not to really harp on these things but these are somethings which bothered me, so I did harp on it and I did bring it up.

Yes, I am bringing it up again. Yes, I am stupidly generous.

But this blog is not about what happened. It is about what changed.

I changed.

I decided that I will continue to have a good time with friends but it will not happen on my expense.

I decided that I have better ways to enjoy life than go drinking and spending that much money on Friday nights - I don't earn that much and my plastic (credit cards) are beginning to melt.

I will continue to enjoy a few drinks every now and then, even go to Cavells for a few drinks, go to karaoke's (Red Box deal's are quite good with 2 beers and a decent buffet meal for RM50), go to kopitiam with beer and food sessions, hang out for coffee, go makan makan.

But it's likely not going to be on Friday nights.

My Friday nights are now filled with spending time to sit and chat and meditate and hang around with people who care and basically getting spiritual ... to believe, to trust, to accept to seek forgiveness.

I have not become all religious or crazy.

But I am truly having fun times on Friday nights, sitting around, chatting, joking, talking about football, politics and anything under the sun but then meditating, being closer to God, and late night supper (not breakfast at 4am but supper at 11pm).

Monday to Thursday nights, I can go out do the other things.

My Friday nights are booked - of course unless I am on vacation.

Take care and be well.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Faith, Hope but most of all - Love

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.

Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Above excerpt taken from The Bible 1 Corinthians 13 or which was read during a prayer session on Friday evening and a copy was given to me.

Take care and be well.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

So, should the vuvuzela's and lepatata's be banned?

I say heck no ... we have to deal with air horns and beach balls and fireworks and smoke stuff in other matches ... I can leave with a noisy 127 decibel plastic horn.

It is comforting, like being inside a bee hive, with a family of bees, watching the world cup.

But if allergic to bees, that poor fella will be having nightmares.

For those who have no idea still what a vuvuzela is, this is the Wiki entry, summarised below.

The vuvuzela, sometimes called a "lepatata" (its Tswana name) or a stadium horn, is a blowing horn up to approximately 1 m (3 ft 3 in) in length. It is commonly blown by fans at football matches in South Africa.[1] The instrument requires some lip and lung strength to blow and emits (from the standard shorter horn of 60–65 cm) a loud monotone (B♭3). A similar instrument (known as corneta in Brazil and other Latin American countries) is used by football fans in South America.[2] Very similar plastic horns have also been a tradition at the Quebec Winter Carnival for many years.

Vuvuzelas have been controversial. They have been associated with permanent noise-induced hearing loss, cited as a possible safety risk when spectators cannot hear evacuation announcements, and potentially spread colds and flu viruses on a greater scale than coughing or shouting. Vuvuzelas have also been blamed for drowning the sound and atmosphere of football games. Commentators have described the sound as "annoying" and "satanic" and compared it with "a stampede of noisy elephants", "a deafening swarm of locusts", "a goat on the way to slaughter", and "a giant hive full of very angry bees".

The sound level of the instrument has been measured at 127 decibels contributing to football matches with dangerously high sound pressure levels for unprotected ears. A new model, however, announced on 14 June 2010, has a modified mouthpiece which is claimed to reduce the volume by 20 dB.


Take care and be well.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

'Till nineteen

The left handed kinddie teacher, John in kinddie, the milkman, the gardener, the husband and wife school bus drivers.

First friend in Standard 1 was Thomas T, Headmaster was Anthony, 1 Merah, Aussie Teacher teaching how to throw a boomerang, Jambu Air next to school and Upland girls.

Police and thieves, gymnastics, gardening, Japanese soldiers chopping head stories, and 5 cents cordial drinks.

Asterix and Obelix, Tin Tin and his adventures, a strict library teacher who slapped me, and glass thermos.

Autograph books, sports day, BCG injection, school dentist and playing marbles, S and wearing shorts.

Sleeping Buddha’s , nice Malay neighbours, Uncle Looi and nice Dewali parties and fire-works.

Uncle Jetpuria with a cake in hand to celebrate my 5th birthday, drumsticks growing on a tree which we used as our light sabers.

A physics teacher nicknamed Botak, a biology teacher with a nasal twang and Mrs Ooi and Mrs Linda Ho were the best teachers I’ve had.

Brother Casimir, the priest in a white robe was the principal, Colin and other disciplinary teachers and a wonderful art teacher named Michael.

Many friends lost over the years, many found in Facebook, many remembered and some departed like Babu in Canada.

Primary in St Xavier’s Branch, secondary in an Institution, being a break monitor and a librarian.

Clubs here and there, UNESCO club, this club and that club.

Curry Puff with pickled onions and 20cents for a plate of Mamak Mee and 15 cent roti canai.

Convent girls, big field across the road, being boxed in the stomach in front of tennis court and playing “sepak” or dodge ball with shoes.

A trip to KL, Melaka and Singapore – some things were nice, some were not but we were 14.

RAAF Radio, Color television, P.Ramlee movies, Pontianak and and Amitabh Bachan movies in Rex theatre.

Sunday picnics, Bangkok Lane mamak mee, learning Pascal and Cobol in Tan Mark and making electronic led boards.

Penang Hill, Gurney Drive, Batu Ferringhi, Botanical Gardens, Youth Park and hiking to Muka Head.

Haunted brother’s bungalow, haunted beaches, ghost stories and hantu kum kum.

Doing badly in SPM, supportive parents, going off to KL to KDU.

Many friends, many enemies, many parties and house at No 5 and Spot the dalmation.

No internet, no good libraries, but Wong Hoi Cheong, David, Annie Khoo and many others taught us.

Trip to Port Dickson, trip to Genting, Mimaland are all now memories.

That was life until nineteen.

Many friends come and go, many friends remain, many friends are forgotten.

Some were nice and some were not.

But these memories will remain. Those were the growing pains, those were the developing years.

Life is a wonderful thing, life is beautiful, life is life and life happens.

Take care and be well.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Happy Birthday Mom, wherever you are

A Mother's love is something
that no on can explain,
It is made of deep devotion
and of sacrifice and pain,
It is endless and unselfish
and enduring come what may
For nothing can destroy it
or take that love away . . .
It is patient and forgiving
when all others are forsaking,
And it never fails or falters
even though the heart is breaking . . .
It believes beyond believing
when the world around condemns,
And it glows with all the beauty
of the rarest, brightest gems . . .
It is far beyond defining,
it defies all explanation,
And it still remains a secret
like the mysteries of creation . . .
A many splendoured miracle
man cannot understand
And another wondrous evidence
of God's tender guiding hand.

By Helen Steiner Rice


The above poem is called A Mother's Love.

Which I've been missing for many years now ....
Happy Birthday Mummy.
I miss you, so very much.
I love you always.
Forgive me for all the bad things I may have done or said that hurt your feelings.
Thank you for all your guidance you have given and continue to guide me to this day.
I remember your prayers and they have always followed me.They have clung to me all my life.
Rest in peace and always know that I will always love you.

Hundreds of dewdrops to greet the dawn,
Hundreds of bees in the purple clover,
Hundreds of butterflies on the lawn,
But only one mother the wide world over.

Take care and be well.

Saturday, June 12, 2010

The boys, the boys, waving flag

The boys the boys (Bafana bafana) as the South African footballers are called started out with a very entertaining 1st world cup match on African soil when they played Mexico.

Of course you can expect the French wimps to spoil the next game with a 0-0 boring game.

Yes, World Cup has started. And with it many new interesting songs like this one called waving flag by K'naan.

When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back
Born to a throne, stronger than Rome
But Violent prone, poor people zone
But it’s my home, all I have known
Where I got grown, streets we would roam
But out of the darkness, I came the farthest
Among the hardest survival
Learn from these streets, it can be bleak
Except no defeat, surrender retreat
So we struggling, fighting to eat and
We wondering when we’ll be free
So we patiently wait, for that fateful day
It’s not far away, so for now we say
When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back
So many wars, settling scores
Bringing us promises, leaving us poor
I heard them say, love is the way
Love is the answer, that’s what they say,
But look how they treat us, make us believers
We fight their battles, then they deceive us
Try to control us, they couldn’t hold us
Cause we just move forward like Buffalo Soldiers
But we struggling, fighting to eat
And we wondering, when we’ll be free
So we patiently wait, for that faithful day
It’s not far away, but for now we say
When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back
When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back.

Argentina to lift to cup??

Take care and be well.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

If by chance...

There is this plaque that my dad has had for many many years. I think since my primary school days.

I will write what is on the plaque soon but under the plaque, my dad has typed and pasted these words, "Read, Think, Give A Seriouse(sic) Thought, And Apply in Your Daily Life."

Very simple words on the plaque, somewhat common sense even, but many people over the years have been critical of the plaque. I could not understand why.

As the plaque reads:-

I do my thing,
and you do
your thing.

I am not in
this world
to live up
to your
expectations

And you are
not in this
world to live
up to mine.

You are you
and I am I,

And if by
chance
we find
each other,

it's beautiful.


Life is beautiful when people meet.

Companionship is about a union of people with compassion and passion sailing together one one ship to some destination, through the storms and high winds and calm seas.

Take care and be well.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Bee Pee - the joke ain't funny anymore

Taken from Associated Press.

They are the ghastly images of a summer fouled before it started. Squawking seagulls and majestic brown pelicans coated in oil. Click. Gunk dripping from their beaks. Click. Big eyes wide open. Click.



An exhausted oil-covered brown pelican sits in a pool of oil.



An oil-soaked bird struggles against the side of an Iron Horse supply vessel.



Take care and be well.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Quotes

I have been using quotes many times in my Facebook. Some are quotes that I have created, some are from friends and some are from others, some famous and some not.

These are various quotes I have used over the last few weeks/months:

Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.

Everyone just keeps trying to make sense of things, trying to change, trying to be better, trying to make peace … Problem is they are trying and nobody is doing. Stop trying, just do.

We are hypnotised by our environment that we cannot see beyond the horizon of our experience.

Sometimes words or pictures can never explain what you are thinking or feeling. Those times, you keep quiet, sit in solitude, be grateful.

Trust, Accept, Forgive, Believe.

We must move away from comfort zones and go to our combat zones to defeat the bad seeds we’ve planted in our lives. Once done, let that be the past. The good is from now, the happiness is from now and the love is from now.

I pray for guidance, I pray for wisdom, I pray for forgiveness, I pray for health, I pray for connection….. I pray for my soul.

Take heart. Be kind and gentle. Go slow. Forgive yourself. Accept all apologies and forgive others. Be true to yourself. Trust in God or the universal energy.

Take heart in knowing that where you or I come from is not important. What is done is done. But you can change the present and the future by doing the right thing from now. NOW is where it begins…. Not then. Let go of then, and let go of it NOW.

Thrown away the navigation system that’s been taking me in circles on my road to peace and happiness. Seeking it within myself and taking one day at a time.

Planning, thinking, doing …

I’m ok, you’re ok, let’s karaoke.

Through the mist, there is just me, finding my own path. Not a friend nor a foe, not even God nor the devil.

I am a human whatever that may be. I want to see more clearly where I have been and where I am going. And I want to know why I am here.

Turbulence is just a temporary setback you face in life’s journey. If you feel you’re going to crash or prepare for jumping off the plane everytime you hit turbulence, your journey will not be happy. Take a deep breath and enjoy your journey as much as you look forward to the destination.

There is nothing like a dream to create a future. There is nothing like hope. There is nothing like a wish. There is nothing like love, joy and happiness. Embrace them daily, welcome them into your heart and thoughts.

Just for today, do not worry. Just for today, do not anger. Honour your parents, teachers and elders. Earn your living honestly. Show gratitude to every living thing.

Take care and be well.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Top News

Most viewed:
• China dolls offer services via MMS
• Cabbie who raped passengers nabbed
• Specialist at Selayang hospital arrested over graft
• Sacked leader slams Samy Vellu
• I have faith in Tee Yong, says Najib

Most emailed
• Jogger falls victim to credit card swapping syndicate
• Oversupply of docs in 5 years, says Chua
• Specialist at Selayang hospital arrested over graft
• PM to look into scholarships
• Cabbie who raped passengers nabbed

This is the top news in the top English Malaysian newspaper.

I wonder why I have stopped reading news.

I skim through it. I see the headlines like above and skip it.

I "seriously" read the comics. How can you not laugh at classics like this:


And since the World Cup is coming, I do read the football news a little. Of course, a classic battle in the NBA finals between Boston Celtics and Los Angelus Lakers is one to watch out for as well.

But news, bah, I'll skip it, I have enough things to deal with in my own world.

Take care and be well.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Looking for space

On the road of experience I'm trying to find my own way.
Sometimes I wish that I could fly away
When I think that I'm moving suddenly things stand still
I'm afraid 'cause I think they always will

And I'm looking for space
And to find out who I am
And I'm looking to know and understand
It's a sweet sweet dream
Sometimes I'm almost there
Sometimes I fly like an eagle
And sometimes I'm deep in despair

All alone in the universe, sometimes that's how it seems
I get lost in the sadness and the screams
Then I look in the center, suddenly everything's clear
I find myself in the sunshine and my dreams

And I'm looking for space
And to find out who I am
And I'm looking to know and understand
It's a sweet, sweet dream
Sometimes I'm almost there
Sometimes I fly like an eagle
And sometimes I'm deep in despair

On the road of experience, join in the living day
if there's an answer, it's just that it's just that way

When you're looking for space
And to find out who you are
When you're looking to try and reach the stars
It's a sweet, sweet sweet dream
Sometimes I'm almost there
Sometimes I fly like an eagle
But sometimes I'm deep in despair
Sometimes I fly like an eagle,
like an eagle
I go flying flying

I have been listening to a lot of John Denver lately.

Above is likely among his less popular songs compared to Leaving on a Jetplane, Country Roads, Calypso and Annie's Song.

But among my favorite songs right now, at this moment in my life.

Take care and be well.