About Me

I have done a lot of things in my life and have also worked in many different jobs to make a living and to experience life. This blog is just some of my musings, sometimes funny, sometimes inspirational, sometimes sad, sometimes angry, sometimes simple but all the time, it's just me.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Dealing with change - SARAH model

The last few years have certainly been challenging and a lot of changes faced and managed.

Perhaps the greatest challenge is: rapid change.

Over the years, I have dealt with a lot of change. Some techniques can help move one from being reactive to being proactive to change.

First, we have to know and accept that change involves loss. Even positive change I have had like going for a 3 month assignment in Netherlands involved loss such as loss of loved one, loss of friendship for that period of time. But I had to understand my loss, I had to experience my loss and check it against the gains that I got from the change.

Then the second thing will be to accept or reject the change. If the potential gains do not outweigh the losses, you may choose to reject the change. However, some changes like a death of a loved one cannot be rejected.

Often, however, the preferred option is acceptance. This does not happen overnight.

God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change. Courage to change the things I can and the Wisdom to know the difference.

Then always approach change as a process. Don't expect immediate happiness of the change. We may need to bear with temporary discomfort.

Some changes may be welcomed and same are obviously not. Change can be disorienting and uncomfortable or even painful, initially. But, this too shall pass.

There are stages we move through.

The following SARAH model, outlines classic stages of change:

Shock - numbness, confusion, disorientation

Anger - or (directed inward) - depression, sadness, fear

Rejection - including denial of emotional impact

Acceptance - or (negatively) - resignation, i.e., hopeless "acceptance"

Hope - positive focus on the future

It is important to also develop a positive outlook. Negativity kills, literally!

Stress, brought on by negative thoughts and actions, can lead to greater possibility of illness.

Turn those killer thoughts into more positive and realistic internal dialogue.

Practice the following process that has been shared by others:
- Recognize: realize that you're thinking negatively
- STOP: visualize a STOP sign and tell yourself to Stop It!
- Restate: reframe into a positive statement
- Reward: even if it's just giving yourself a pat on the back

It is always important to make a plan. Translate the positive attitude with a positive plan of action.

As with any good plan, include short-term goals and timetables.

Develop a support system. Surround yourself with positive people, who care about you. And let them in. Share the challenge you're facing, your stumbles and your triumphs.

Finally, be flexible. Accept that life is a series of detours. The best laid plans too have detours.

Remember, we can handle this!

Take care and be well.

1 comment:

Ser said...

Change is necessary to make us all grow better (depending on how one handles the situation.

However what's not so nice is that some people can be very impulsive and others have to handle the burden of the impulsiveness instead.....it becomes complicated when one have to not only handle changes but the impact of change on the implulsivness!!!!!! Go figure.