About Me

I have done a lot of things in my life and have also worked in many different jobs to make a living and to experience life. This blog is just some of my musings, sometimes funny, sometimes inspirational, sometimes sad, sometimes angry, sometimes simple but all the time, it's just me.

Friday, February 18, 2011

And it is done

Divine creator, father, mother, son as one
If I, my family, relatives and ancestors
have offended you, your family, relatives and ancestors
in thoughts, words, deeds and actions
from the beginning of our creation to the present,
we ask your forgiveness
Let this cleanse, purify, release, cut
all the negative memories, blocks, energies and vibrations,
and transmute these unwanted energies into pure light
And it is done.
~ Mornah's Prayers


Daily, I am digging into my heart and with difficulty I bear my soul. I have sinned. Which one of us have not? But this is not a judgement on others, that is not my role.

I have manifested this existence of mine, I have manifested the good and the bad, and many a times we tend to dwell on the bad.

In January I started this journey. It is a miracle for me to have stumbled upon the book. A book I stumbled upon many times before, even bought as a gift for a friend. And in the end, some divine inspiration in me as me to pick the book up and go through the 30 day journey and to change my life around.

It is a process and everyday is a new day. My issues have not dissolved magically, but daily there are miracles.

However, sometimes, I feel like I have reached a wall, I become frantic and desperate, and then I say Mornah's prayers above and I say "I'm sorry, Please forgive me, I love you, Thank you." to all my issues.

Many different clairvoyant people keep telling me I am an old soul. For a long time, I did not know how one would measure an age of a soul. But also, for a long time, I have been born in a faith that believes in reincarnation.

As such, in my faith, for someone to be ascended, the soul must have done good deeds throughout his life and asked for forgiveness for any sins that he may have committed.

To be reborn over and over again for thousands or hundreds of time basically means the soul is not ready to be ascended, likely because of the many sins committed as well as the refusal to seek for forgiveness.

Thus, being an old soul is not something that I looked at positively, but with the heavy burden of an old soul and many sins from generations and lives of past.

I also did not believe that murderers and rapist could become religious and join certain types of religions and their sins will all be forgiven by God.

However, I do believe that God will forgive anyone who is truly seeking forgiveness in his heart.

I do believe in God, in one God. And I believe God has many angels and guardians sent to protect us.

I have been disillusioned about religion before but never about the existence of God, of his Universal power. Never once I have considered myself to be an atheist.

Some people talk that the suffering you face in this lifetime is karma, something manifested from your soul in this lifetime or even previous lifetimes.

But if suffering is karma, then should also be all the good things experienced in life, all the miracles and all the blessings received, this too should be karma.

Despite many miracles and blessings in my life, life is sometimes a struggle.

Some people seek God only when life becomes a struggle.

I seek God and my guardian daily, they guide me in my daily chores and in my daily struggles. Yes, sometimes, the answers are not straightforward and not as forthcoming, but I do receive divine guidance and inspiration.

However, sometimes, all of us, we get divine inspiration, we get inspired for the moment and that is it. We do not do anything further. We get back to the daily grind, to the rat race, to the busyness of life of doing nothing and achieving nothing.

Friends come and go in our lives. Some good, some bad. Teachers come and go in our lives, again some good and some bad.

In good, there is bad; and in bad there is good. This is the principals of Yin and Yang; a perfect balance of good and bad; and good within the bad and bad within the good.

It is what we make of the good and the bad and what we make of the lessons that we learn along the way.

If God tells you to be kind consistently, and you heed the advice for 2 days of the week and not for the other 3 days; you have failed. If your guardian says, "Write." What do you do?

I have said this before, I am not God, and I am not an angel, nor am I a divine guardian.

I am me, this is who I am.

I work in a full time job.

I love writing, so I started a blog. I aspire to write a few books.

I sometimes struggle to pay the bills like many of us in this day and age where costs of things keep going higher and higher.

I enjoy a nice holiday.

I dream of being wealthier, healthier and wiser. I hope and pray that I receive some guidance to achieve that.

I am doing my best to live my life passionately, to love everyone completely, to learn from people humbly and when God tells me that my time is up, I will leave boldly.

Many miracles have happened in this lifetime of mine and I am certain many miracles have happened in previous lifetimes.

God loves us all dearly, we just have to learn to love God back completely, to truly open our hearts.

This old soul of mine, I think is tired, and when God says my time is up in this lifetime, I do want to leave boldly and hopefully never come back.

As such, I seek forgiveness from all. There are many miracles and I pray this is given to me with eternal love and my gratitude is infinite.

Divine creator, father, mother, son as one ....If I, my family, relatives and ancestors have offended you, your family, relatives and ancestors in thoughts, words, deeds and actions from the beginning of our creation to the present, I ask your forgiveness. Let this cleanse, purify, release, cut all the negative memories, blocks, energies and vibrations, and transmute these unwanted energies into pure light ..... And it is done.

I love you. I am sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.

Take care and be well.

2 comments:

Sneha said...

nice post Nil... I liked it and I can relate many of things you described to me..
All the best with you writing passion

One Woman's Thoughts said...

I am inspired by Mornah's prayer and by your words of thought.

To visit with you is to leave thinking about life and looking more deeply into one's heart and soul.